What is Love?

" What is love?  Oh, baby don't hurt me.  Baby don't hurt me no more.  Oh, baby don't hurt me.  Baby don't hurt me no more.  What is love?  Yeah...oh, I don't know why you're not there.  I give you my love, but you don't care.  So what is right and what is wrong...gimme a sign.  What is love?  Oh, baby don't hurt me.  Baby don't hurt me no more.  What is love?  Oh, baby don't hurt me.  Baby don't hurt me no more."    -What is Love? by Haddaway

What is love?  People have been asking such a question since the world began.  Even this one hit wonder could not seem to figure out.  He has no idea what love is but he does know that he does not want to be hurt.  This song may be simply be a nostalgic glimpse into some of our pasts but I believe it also proclaims a prophetic statement of our humanity.

We want love but we get lost on where to find it.  We attempt to pour out "love" yet are not sure if what we are doing is correct...we are looking for a sign.  And as we as mortals reach out with one hand for an embrace we hold the other up in defense in case the quest for love does not go well...in case the other person "does not care".  What a sad existence...always longing for acceptance and confirmation of worth but always remaining on guard for failure.

What is love?

Will we ever know?

The last week of my life consisted of watching 66 kids between the ages of 5 and 11 screaming out this question.  "What is love?  Yeah...oh, I don't know why you're not there.  I give you my love, but you don't care."  I spent a week at camp for kids that have been sexually, emotionally, or physically abused.  "So what is right and what is wrong...gimme a sign.  What is love?"  These kids have spent their entire lives looking for love in a world in which those that were charged with loving them have shirked that responsibility.  They are looking for anything to which they think might bring them the answer to their question.  Acting out, sexual expression, physical dominance...after all...what is love?

This question not only rang out for the kids but the staff and counselors...what is love?  Where does it come from?  How is it expressed?  As I work to understand the meaning of love and what it is...all I know is that the only thing that I can hold on to is the ultimate example of love.  Our world has shown us many different ways to show love...even the Bible can be confusing in its expression...so I just choose to focus on the concept.

"But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.  Since we have now been justified by his blood, how much more shall we be saved from God's wrath through him!  For if, when we were God's enemies, we were reconciled to him through the death of his Son, how much more, having been reconciled, shall we be saved through his life!  Not only is this so, but we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received reconciliation." Romans 5:8-11 (NIV)

Now you know...live accordingly.

Squiggles

Words are the way in which we as humans primarily communicate.  We also use non-phonic methods such as gestures, body language, and guttural sounds but it is the words that, for those speaking English, are formed from the twenty-six different symbols that we call letters.  It is extremely arbitrary if you think about it.  Our entire system of communication if based upon choosing random squiggles, designating a sound to that squiggle, putting the squiggles into groupings, and then giving those groupings meaning.  "Elephant" could have just as easily been spelled "Asqtinfi".  A "pencil" could have been "stomachache".  The whole thing is so simple and un....unsolid.  Yet it controls everything that we do.  Prolonged expression of squiggle groupings have started and ended wars.  The lack of the expression has done the same.  "Love" is the word that God has chosen to use His unending, unconditional, unquantifiable care and protection and passion and affection for us...we also use it to talk about our favorite Skittle color.  Depending on when or where you grew up the meanings of words change.  Being "Bad" is not always so awful.  "Freedom" does not mean lack of responsibility.  "Fatherhood" is not disposable.  We all look at words and meanings differently.  I think that is what makes cultures so vibrant is the ability of its citizens to continuously expand and explore and grow.  God does the same thing with His Word and the Bible.  He wants us to explore who He is and who we are to worship and serve Him...but just like exploration can be beneficial, one can never forget where they came from.  Words can also gain or lose their power depending on who is presenting them and how they are doing it.  "Hands in the air" is taken differently depending on whether a child or a policemen is speaking.  Many of us do based solely on the presence of the person that is telling us what to do.  I am a Christian and believe in the God as my savior because the God of the universe said so.  It all depends on the authorities that we respect, if we even consider them authorities.  Humans often determine the value of words and concepts on how they view the person.  Researchers once had two men of similar age and education experiences, one with a British accent and another a Southern accent, read a speech to an audience.  Both speeches were identical in content.  Listeners were later asked to choose which man was more educated and provided better information.  People overwhelmingly chose the British man.  The British man was deemed smarter because of how he was perceived.  The audience automatically shut out the words of the other man because they deemed him to not be an "authority".  We pigeon hole people and their messages based on the words and language that they use...especially when it makes us uncomfortable.  Man does not like to hear they are wrong and thus jump to conclusions and actions because of it.  Words are powerful.  They have the ability to heal and destroy.  Do not judge someone or ignore their words purely because of age, gender, wealth, education, word choice, or personal injury.  Be open.  Ask questions.  Know the motives and concepts behind the words for after all...words are just squiggles.

James 3:3-12 (NIV)
³ When we put bits into the mouths of horses to make them obey us, we can turn the whole animal. ⁴ Or take ships as an example. Although they are so large and are driven by strong winds, they are steered by a very small rudder wherever the pilot wants to go. ⁵ Likewise the tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark. ⁶ The tongue also is a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole person, sets the whole course of his life on fire, and is itself set on fire by hell. ⁷ All kinds of animals, birds, reptiles and creatures of the sea are being tamed and have been tamed by man, ⁸ but no man can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison.
⁹ With the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in God's likeness. ¹⁰ Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers, this should not be.
¹¹ Can both fresh water and salt water flow from the same spring? My brothers, can a fig tree bear olives, or a grapevine bear figs? Neither can a salt spring produce fresh water.